I wrap my hands around the warm cup and take a sip of black tea, put it back onto the saucer - pause - and within just a few moments I raise it to my lips again, repeating this action until only the silt and a few drops of amber tea remain. Most likely I refill the cup, drinking at an even quicker pace, now that the tea kettle has become more temperate and makes for much easier handling. My preferred means of consumption is to consume it quickly, to consecutively gulp, not as to scald my tongue, nor to allow it to become too tepid.
I suppose my mannerisms of drinking tea can be applied to my daily life. I'm a bit of an anxious being when it comes to success and recognition. I'm a must-have-it-now kind of person, especially when it comes to my personal goals and aspirations. I have the habit of setting enormous, maybe impossible expectations for myself, am continuously comparing myself to others, and seem to hold the amazing capability of giving outstanding advice, while being utterly unsuited to receiving it, or heeding my own.
Today marks the two year anniversary of Sobremesa In Spain's worldwide launch. Truthfully, I'm not throwing confetti in the air, or patting myself on the back, because frankly, this site hasn't grown with quite the vigor that I had hoped for. I wanted to "change lives" with my words, stories and photographs. I was hoping to save thousands of tourists from eating paella on La Rambla, or darting into a cave-esque taberna in Madrid where they would be served day-old bread and microwaved eggs, and I really wanted this project to reach people interested in changing their local agriculture system, starting by getting to know their neighboring artisans, farms and locally grown products/produce. So if you're one to judge solely by social media standards...the last two years have been a failure.
On the other hand, I'm not about to forgive or pardon myself for thinking unfavorably, I'll not mark it as a 2013 resolution to change my habits, or attempt to alter my personal character. I may not be seeing immediate results where I'd like to see them, however I fear that relinquishing myself of this complex might change my desire and ability to complete my goals, convert me into being lazy on some fronts, and ultimately erase my competitive spirit. Also, I'd truly like to believe that I will eventually cross-off from my list many of the things that I wish and hope for - and that I will have even greater successes - even if they don't happen precisely when I want them to.
Now, don't get me wrong, I still have plenty of things to be grateful for, my "Gratitude" series reminds me of all of the blessings and daily flow of greatness that does enter my life. However, this anniversary post is not a reflection of the past, or a dwelling of the present, but a call for the future; on to bigger and more noteworthy things.
So my moral of my two year anniversary post is to be who you are. To continually blaze the path that you believe in. As much as you desire others to join along, get on-board and praise your work or doings; acknowledge that they may never. Your success will be certified by many or by few, but it will be noticed. There is no true measure for this success, as we all sip our tea at different intervals, with different grades of tea quality, one, two or three packets of sugar, the wells where we fetch our water is of varied heights and our tea cups are of assorted shapes and sizes.
You are strong. You are creative. You are on your path.
You're life is yours and only yours, therefore it is unique.
Your words* are entirely your own, and that's beautiful.
No one will ever take the same picture as you, have the same conversation or memory. The world was turning at a different moment for the aforementioned person.
Keep improving, modifying, dreaming, and achieving.
*it's OK to use the dictionary and thesaurus.
The Holstee Manifesto©